Journal Day 1:
Two days ago, I raged and ranted at my father about my brother. Finally after I calmed down a bit, my dad started to talk. To be honest I didn't expect any sort of solution from him, but he had part of the answer. He started telling me to view things from my brother's perceptive. When he comes home, - nearly all the time-, someone is always yelling at him to pick up his stuff or to shut up and a round of name calling takes place. Why would he want to come back to this type of atmosphere? When he eventually does he can't wait to go away. Basically, we emotionally and verbally abuse him. It's true he has been the first instigate abuse. His drug problem is his source of escape. If home isn't a place of comfort, what else could he do? I'm not saying that is only option, but that is what his friends do.
For hours, we explored the different possibilities that lead to his choices. In the end, we decided on the only solution we could muster, endurance and support. Instead of yelling at him, we ask him politely and if he still ignores we complete the task ourselves.
My boy still has a conscience and it's our goal to appeal to it by showing our love for him. We do love him, without doubt and reason. We don't want to see him hurt or destroyed. We want to show him we love him. For the past two days we've been extremely polite and patient. He's noticed the change in our demeanor, as well. He commented on it but he's pleased not suspicious. So far, there is hope and all patient souls get a special place in heaven (they better!!!).
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