Entry of Rule 23

Rule number 23: Go club hopping.

I'm going to attempt that this Thursday, I really need to do this at least once in my life. My birthday is tomorrow I'm gonna be 24 and I've never been to a night club in my life. 

My parents are paranoid about me going out that late at night. I guess this is were the culture clash comes into my life. I'm in my 20s but I gotta inform my parents if I go out at night. I actually have to make excuses for my late night trips. I don't crave the party life but I want to attempt this at least once. 

I've already made my excuses with my mom. I told her me and my best friend Tara are going to a theater play. Plus my dad's not here to wring his hands if I'm late. Clubs don't become active before 12 am. I'm really excited, I'm looking for a sexy dress and I'm wondering if I'm hot enough to get in.

Run away

  Sometimes I wish I could run away from my family. Far, far away! Live in the woods, in a cozy cabin. I could write or read a book and play music all day. I would love to worry about nothing, but that's never going to happen. 

  I'm always going to be a part of this family and they are always going to badger me about things. I'm afraid that in the coming months I might actually break down and go along with them. Marry in haste, repent in leisure. 

  Its beyond my understanding why they won't accept my answer and wishes. I'm really worn out, I'm an aggressive person when I need to be but for the past few weeks I've just become tired.  

 I have a history mid-term tomorrow. I like history and I remember names well. Its the exact dates I have problems with. Well I hope I do well, I deserve a break.

Dues - worst week

1. Rear ended my dad's car.

2. Someone scratched my car.

3. Been super ill, sore throat and leaky nose. I sit in my class and sniffle the whole entire time - like a nasty 3rd grader.

4. Got stuck in traffic for 3 hours, twice - screw you 405 freeway. 

5. I was late for class the first time ever!

6. My dad left for India, I'm not sad about that. I just miss him terribly, he's my precious - who am I supposed to bug and emotionally blackmail? Plus, I'm sick and he's super nice to me.

7. The worst is....I GOT A BIG FAT F IN MATH!!!! For the first time in my life I got an F, only for 4 answers right.

8. After I left class with my disgraceful F, I stuffed my water bottle into my bag. When I got home I realized my bottle was leaking and my dad's cellphone(long story) and my sister's ipod were in my bag. Yes, both are ruined!

Some weeks are just not mine, worst part is I can't fall a sleep and I'm only causing problems around me. I manged to ruin 2 cars, 1 ipod, 1 cellphone and 1 math test.
   

Don't throw stones at glass houses...

 

  What the heck? I thought houses were for privacy and protection. With these new modern glass designs it seems the inhabitants want neither. I love my privacy and my cluttered room. These houses would make stalking so much easier. Seriously, people where is the logic in this? Or am I the only one who watches way too many episodes of Dateline and Deadly Women?

NOT funny!

Somebody keyed my car! MY FREAKIN' CAR! 
I bumped the back of my dad's van day before and somebody keyed my car today. Even though it's barely noticeable, you can see the little scrape. It's done with a a key! This isn't funny!

My black Prius is a exactly year old and somebody keyed it outside the - that frozen yogurt place. I'm super careful when I'm driving and parking. What the hell is going on?! 
CARMA! That crap better not be true because I deserve brownie points for being such a considerate driver. I'm really depressed! Why would anyone do that?

OH MAN! OH MAN! OH VAN!

OMIGOD! I JUST SCRAPED MY DAD'S BRAND NEW VAN! ITS ONLY 4 MONTHS OLD!! 
I got it scratched against the concrete wall, the left - back corner part! I feel so bad, if I was the crying type I'd be bawling my lungs out. I broke part of the left tail light's glass. I told my dad right away, I was backing it the parking lot and scarped it. He's upset - he has no right - he scratched  it, too.

School

I got an A in last week's math today, 100%. I know I'm amazed, too.

I tutor 4 kids, I tutor them in everything except math. Other than math my mind can absorb just about everything, its like a sponge. I observe and absorb, I'm not boasting. In high school, my teacher's thought I cheated on the tests(that's right more than one), but had no way to prove it. They decided to have me tested, with the approval of my dad who didn't hesitate to mention that I was like a bag of rocks when it came to math. Anyways, I have an IQ 164 and still I suck at math. My troll math teacher is actually helping me understand numbers better.  

The Return of the Family Circus

   
  I have a love hate relationship with my relatives, I love how close we are and I hate how close we are. My relatives are digging out the past again, they still want me to get married to Issac. My parents want to support me, but they would rather support the thing they feel is right. Basically they keep saying why I should married to: 

1. I'm old - I'm freaking not!!! I'm only 23 - in my head I'm 54 but that's another story. 

2. No one is really interested in me - this is might be a fact, other than that cute nerd in my Anthropology class, who stammers every time I talk to him. Then again I'm not interested in anyone either. I don't know whats going on, I know its on my bucket list to kiss a boy but I think there is something wrong with the boys this year. The good looking ones are either gay or smoking weed and confused. I haven't crossed one good looking dude this semester.

3. I'll be past the child bearing age - hey science will catch up, right? Besides, I don't really want a baby, do I?

4. Issac is perfect - I wouldn't even attempt to disagree with that, he's good looking, super intelligent, interesting, fun and he is so goddamn perfect - but he's not perfect for me...or I'm not perfect for him? I don't have any blood ties to him, so it isn't forbidden but still I feel brotherly affection for him. I realize now that he cares for me in a different way but I don't and it kills me. He is a wonderful person, I don't want to be the one to cause him any sort of pain. 

My family keeps telling me how happy I'll be with him. I believe that but then I can't shove my feelings aside either. Plus I might end up cheating him out of someone amazing. I'm really tired with this, I feel conflicted. Not because I don't know what I want, its because I do and they're creating a sliver of self doubt in me.